Feb 16, 2010

Life Checklist

I got this from HayLee’s blog. The list part. The comments all me, baby.
I like it because it doesn’t “tag” or “guilt” you at the end. You know what I’m talking about.

Instructions: Take the following list and bold the items you have completed or experienced.

1. Started your own blog - Yes. Whoo. Off to a great start already.
2. Slept under the stars - Wouldn't be an Eagle Scout if I hadn't.
3. Played in a band - sadly, no. Unless singing along with a group in concert for their live album counts. If so, consider that bolded, thanks, Thriving Ivory!
4. Visited Hawaii - Someday.
5. Watched a meteor shower - I have, in the Grand Canyon, no less.
6. Given more than you can afford to charity - lame joke about having a friend named Charity, still no.
7. Been to Disneyland - But of course.
8. Climbed a mountain - See #2. And in Yosemite. (Or #5)
9. Held a praying mantis - Not that I recall. He was hunting at the time. Wah wah waaaaaaah.
10. Sang a solo - Sadly yes, to those who heard it. I think my first public solo was Winthrop in the Music Man.
11. Bungee jumped - No, and never gonna happen. I'll be skinned alive first, thanks.
12. Visited Paris - Not yet. Sacre bleu!
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea - Nay. Though I have slept on a boat. does that count? No? O ye of little faith.
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch - Definition of scratch? Does reading books on the subject count? Oh, what the heck, I'm bolding this baby.
15. Adopted a child - Nope. Morgan is 100% ours.
16. Had food poisoning - Yes, on my mission. Note to reader: expired Kraft Cheese Singles look and taste just like not expired Kraft Cheese Singles.
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty - No sir. One lady I have yet to-- no.
18. Grown your own vegetables - Yes, actually. In Elementary school, I grew carrots (and a few other plants, but carrots were the only ones that took root. Being roots themselves, I shouldn't have been surprised.) And alas, despite implications from grandparents, I've never grown potatoes in my ears.
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France - No, but I've seen pictures of her. And why does it say in France? Is the author of this list among the bitter majority that believe she belongs in Italy? (a majority in which I and my buddy Vincenzo Peruggia are a part of?)
20. Slept on an overnight train - No, but I've fallen asleep on the Amtrak. The train, not the tracks.
21. Had a pillow fight - Oh, my goodness, yes. Very yes. (but you'll get no more details from me, the stewardesses, or any of the charity groups involved.)
22. Hitch hiked - Heck no. I don't wanna get eaten by the Hook man.
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill (shhh) I would never do that. (Never means frequently)
24. Built a snow fort - Growing up in California and Texas, I've never even made a proper snow man (though I have made a snow angel. He looked fat and had a small head.)
25. Held a lamb - Don't think so. Unless you mean certain parts of lamb after it's been cooked to tender deliciousness.
26. Gone skinny dipping - I'll never tell.
27. Run a Marathon - Not in this lifetime, kids.
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice - Venice, no. The Venetian, yes.
29. Seen a total eclipse - Yes, and you can bet I LOOKED RIGHT AT IT! What can I say, I'm a rebel.
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset - Both. In high school and at the beginning of college, I fancied myself a poet, so that was kind of a requirement.
31. Hit a home run - Not unless you count T-Ball or Nintendo. If so, then no.
32. Been on a cruise - I hope to. And in the Caribbean. Not in Alaska or some other fake cruise. ;)
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person - Yup, when I was 4. I was freaked out before and loved it after.
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors - How ancestor are we talking? England or Iceland? No. Spanish Fork, Utah? Yes.
35. Seen an Amish community - Yup. Turns out they weren't Mormons.
36. Taught yourself a new language - Tried learning Italian and currently trying to learn some scripting languages. Not panning out any better than the Italian effort. Plus, I feel even LESS likely to pick up an Italian woman knowing HTML.
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied - Anyone who says that is either lying, or much less greedy than I. Not that I'm too greedy, I just want enough money that I can swim around in it like Scrooge McDuck on "Duck Tales."
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person - The leaning tower? That's on the list? Not my list, baby.
39. Gone rock climbing - See #2 again.
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David - Thanks, Make-A-Wish. True, it's a giant naked man carved from a BIG metamorphic rock, but it remains one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.
41. Sung karaoke - Am I Mormon/A Member of my Family/Into Theater/Deluded in my own level of talent?
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt - Nope. Ironically, I have seen the Ol' Cheater geyser not erupt.
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant - Sorry, my money, my food, my friends. Unless you count one blind date. I don't.
44. Visited Africa - I want to keep the relationship professional.
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight - Yup, even though everyone knows that's when Jaws comes out of the water, but I kept my swimming suit on, so I lived.
46. Been transported in an ambulance - sadly, yes. When I had my seizure before my first leg surgery. One second I'm playing Nintendo, the next thing I remember I'm in the ambulance. Worst game of Mario EVER.
47. Had your portrait painted - Kind of. Nana's painted pictures of all (if not most) of her grandkids, of which I am one. Plus I paid some lady $13 at Knott's Berry Farm to paint a pastel of me. Big Spender.
48. Gone deep sea fishing - Heck yes. Several times. Caught some lovely Barracuda that hung out in our freezer until they went in the trash. Circle of Life.
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person - No, but my parents did when we went to Italy. They said it was overrated. J/K.
50. Been on television - You know it. Once when in utero on Family Feud, other times in Alzheimer's commercials, Boston Market, a few others, and one Smashing Pumpkins video.
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling - Uh uh. No thanks. If I want to be shark bait, I'll dress as Nemo for Halloween. Sharkbait, bruhaha.
52. Kissed in the rain - Not as romantic as the movies portray.
53. Played in the mud - Greg, Brett and I made a mud pit out of the clay next to my parents house and mud wrestled. It was awesome. And despite what they tell you, (they being Greg, Brett, my parents, and the referee) I won.
54. Gone to a drive-in theater - Saw "The Kid" and "What Lies Beneath." Still mad at the ending.
55. Been in a movie - I was in a grad film for a Loyola Marymount graduate, Icebox Dancing.
56. Visited the Great Wall of China - No thanks. I won't even visit the Mediocre Wall of Piscataway.
57. Started a business - EducationalFamilyGames.com. Only cost me $29.95, and didn't make a penny from it. It was required to learn the software at my first Tech Support job.
58. Taken a martial arts class - Always wanted to, never have, except for a free Karate course/sales pitch when I was a kid, only slightly better than the one in Napoleon Dynamite.
59. Visited Russia - see #44
60. Served at a soup kitchen - On my mission, but we served lunches, not just soup.
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies - I tried, but no one would buy them.
62. Gone whale watching - Nope.
63. Got flowers for no reason - Does "Just because" count as a reason? (Just because... I want sex)
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma - No one wants my ex-cancer blood. I've received plenty, though.
65. Gone sky diving - Wheeeee! No.
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp - Nazis. I hate those guys.
67. Bounced a check - Never! Overdrafted my account? Frequently. (bet you thought I'd make some pun about a bouncy check. Please. I have standards.)
68. Flown in a helicopter - I was about to, then they wouldn't let me. No, wait. That wasn't me.
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy - Still got Scruffy, but he's living in a box somewhere.
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial - Yessiree. Twice. Neither time did Abe recognize me.
71. Eaten Caviar - Just because it's expensive, doesn't mean it's good.
72. Pieced a quilt - Nope, haven't even quilted a piece.
73. Stood in Times Square - No, but I've stood in Kanizsa's triangle.
74. Toured the Everglades - Nope, not even the Sometimesglades.
75. Been fired from a job - I think it's my specialty. I should add that to my resume under special skills.
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London - I wanted to, but the Limeys kept going into their dressing rooms.
77. Broken a bone - I think this qualifies.
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle - All the bikers I know don't trust me. They all think I'll wait until they're at a high speed and then push them off. I have no idea why.
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person - Yes. I've also seen it in Arizona.
80. Published a book - No, though this is a goal for my life, even BEFORE this checklist.
81. Visited the Vatican - Nah. I've been to the Mormon Vatican (Temple Square, not BYU, silly)
82. Bought a brand new car - No, but I've bought two NBC cars (new to me).
83. Walked in Jerusalem - Not yet, though that'd be cool, if I ever had the chance of going without the strong likelihood of dying. Maybe if there's a 9th (or 10th) crusade.
84. Had your picture in the newspaper - I have, when I was 8 and wrote a letter to a soldier in Iraq, during Desert shield.
85. Read the entire Bible - I blush to say no. *Blush*. though I HAVE read the Book of Mormon about 10 times, New Testament once, Old Testament, never. Hence why half of it is bolded.
86. Visited the White House - Clinton wouldn't let me in when I came to call.
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating - Nope.
88. Had chickenpox - Yep. I had so many my chicken pox had chicken pox.
89. Saved someone’s life - "DON'T EAT THE POISON APPLE!" There, I just saved yours.
90. Sat on a jury - For a full ten minutes, until they shoved me off. In my defense, I thought it was a class on stage diving.
91. Met someone famous - Sure, like Paul Walker (wow!) and the girl from Step By Step (the cute one, not the smart one, the dumb one, or Suzanne Somers.) AND the director of Beauty & The Beast.
92. Joined a book club - YES! I got 6 awesome friends out of it too!
93. Lost a loved one - I have. Live long enough and we all will.
94. Had a baby - Tracie did most of the work.
95. Seen the Alamo in person - Nope. Once I found out there was no basement, I was like "Why bother?"
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake - No, but I did swim in a puddle of rotten eggs, so that's like halfway there, right?
97. Been involved in a lawsuit - Aside from the incident where I jumped on a jury, no, I'm clear. (knocks on wood.)
98. Owned a cell phone -Yes, I've even Pwned a cell phone.
99. Been stung by a bee - Yes. Though I think I won the war.
100. Copied a post from someone's blog to your own - If I do, I always attribute the source as well as edit it enough to make it my own.

Thanks, HayLee! (see #100)


Charlo said...

Now you must make up your own life checklist... you can't borrow someone elses goals, especially if you could care less about some of htem.


Tracie said...

haha You're so funny.

Heather said...

Loved, loved loved the commentaries. Had me LOL to the point that my lips were actually blurting a couple times. And trust me, I hardly "blurt."