Oct 10, 2013
More than anybody else alive, I would love to meet Neil Gaiman. Be in the same room, shake his hand, watch him autograph my collection of everything he's ever written, fantasize about us becoming friends.
If he came to my hometown or somewhere within driving distance of my residence, perhaps to accept an award, he has so many, or to appear at a convention or writer's workshop, that is where I would go. And he, after a brilliant reading from one of his illuminating works, sits down with a microphone and answers questions of the audience. No one appreciates his fans quite like Neil.
I wonder what would I ask him? My first impulse would be to ask something really deep and impressive about one of his characters, or a microscopic detail in one of his stories, to show him what a passionate admirer I am. Something like 'why does Shadow ask Wednesday's raven to say "Nevermore" when Shadow doesn't seem like the type of person to read Poe?' Even though I don't really care about the answer, I care about him seeing me as a true fan, not a pretender. One who has read all of Sandman and owns a dvd copy of the BBC production of Neverwhere. But others are likely asking him similarly esoteric questions with likely the same reasoning.
If I could ask him anything, my second impulse would be to ask him to lunch or dinner sometime. Not to court the Dream King or something like that, but to hang out, get to know one another, become friends. To show him how similar we are, how my writing and thinking was so like his before I even discovered it. Though after a bit of reflection I think asking a question like that is somewhat cheating. Much like wishing for more wishes from a great brass-skinned genie who plans to twist your wishes anyway before they're made. Also, I realize asking a question like that in a great crowd like this would only invite light laughter, a smile or two, as if I were joking, and then he'd move on to another question.
Finally I think of the perfect question, one I really would want to know, not one to display my devotion, and not one that he's likely been asked a hundred times before or one I could learn by reading his blog (which I do) or watch videos of other interviews and Q&A's with him (also do.) But I think a really meaningful question, better than "how do you become a successful writer?" or "how did you meet your wife Amanda?" or "what's your favorite food?" I would ask Neil Gaiman "When is the happiest you've ever been?"
But I would be one hand in a sea of many, and he wouldn't see me. He answers questions about Doctor Who and which is his favorite character. He answers why he chose to live in Minnesota (everyone knows that) and answers what some of his favorite books are, and questions about Sandman sequels. He smiles at us all, grateful and graceful to his throes of admirers, but never hears me. I sit down, and wonder what Neil would say and how he would answer, while I imagine how happy I'd be if he would have answered.
Apr 22, 2013
Because my printer is awesome and because some people expressed interest, I have about 70 extra copies I need to get rid of/have available for your reading pleasure/horror.
If you're interested, (and I didn't screw things up too much) enter your address and click the button below to order it through PayPal, as selling it on Amazon or other sites means I have to buy an ISBN, about $125 which I don't have or want to spend. The price ($8) is mostly to cover the cost of shipping and printing, hope you enjoy!
Mar 12, 2013
Well, I have some news.
After 3 years and 4 months of working at SecurityMetrics, I am leaving this Friday. It has been my favorite job (as well as longest) with some of the best & most talented people I've ever met, but I felt it's time to move on.
A large part of this is because I've been offered a job as a graphic designer at Wavetronix, and a new internship at InsideOut Development. I start next week, and while it's fairly nerve-wracking to leave what's been my home away from home for the last three years, I'm looking forward to the new adventure as well as working somewhere I can actually use my college degree!
Feb 23, 2013
Hope everyone is having a good time in the internet today. As I'm taking a poetry class and because the internet is a marvelous place, I wanted to share one of the best love poems I've ever read.
When I was losing a year of my education in beautiful Western Virginia's Southern Virginia College-pretend-University, I took a creative writing class. One of the classmates, who turned out to become one of my best friends ever, wrote this poem about a boy's love for his favorite little arthropod. Tho Valentine's Day is over, everyone reach out to your favorite little segmented friend, maybe give them a leaf, dead fly or sugar cube, and read this with the lights turned down low:
I've Got a Mantis in My Pantis
Green and quite extravagantis,
How I love you, little Mantis.
Your abdomen has a slantis,
Precious, pretty little mantis.
You are insect celebrantis.
You get big when you pregnantis,
You have genes dominantis,
You not need a heart transplantis!
Yes, you are quite importantis
Even though I seem tyrantis.
When I run I huff and pantis--
Get in shape for you, my Mantis.
You not from Gamma Quadrantis,
I think you are friend pleasantis!
Won't trade you for a pheasantis,
Or a dog, or elephantis:
You can go in restaurantis,
You not need use a hydrantis,
I know you have no implantis!
At first I was reluctantis,
You ate leaves off my egg-plantis...
Now, heart has one occupantis:
You, my cherised tiny Mantis.
My life no longer stagnantis,
Now I'm feeling flamboyantis!
Go from Goofus to Gallantis--
All because of you, sweet Mantis.
Would you like Oatmeal Instantis?
I have heard it's quite enchantis.
Our attraction clairvoyantis,
Love between me and my Mantis.
Even though you're flatulantis
and make toxic fumes fragrantis,
All that is irrelevantis;
I adore you, little Mantis.
Feb 8, 2013
Tracie's blog is inspiring me to post something from MY journal in high school. I don't have it with me, so I'll just paraphrase.
Blah blah blah blah why don't the girls I like like me back/like me as much as I like them? Blah blah blah cancer sucks blah blah gotta have faith blah blah blabbity blah I'm going to be famous someday blah blah blah cancer blah blah art and poetry blah blahblarg blah girls blah blah blah blah blah video games.
That's pretty accurate actually, laugh if you must. I think to an extent everyone could similarly sum up the majority of their diaries/journals in high school (and before and after). However, I do think journaling is very important, yet I haven't done it in years. I'm not going to say I don't have time for journaling, because I do. The problem is I'm not making time for journaling, for reasons such as: 1) I sort of "journal" in writing to my missionary brother-in-law/from-another-mother every week as well as other friends I'm trying to keep in correspondence with. I'm mostly as open with them as I'd be with myself, so I don't see much of a need for it. I think journals are valuable, and I think it's sad that the art of journaling is sort of lost along with the art of letter writing, when the great minds of our lifespans are published, it won't be the Letters of Neil Gaiman, it will be the emails of Neil Gaiman, the blog of Stephen King, etc. etc. While cool, it's somewhat sad. Writing isn't meant to be written on a keyboard and viewed on a screen. And yes I do see the irony/hypocrisy in where I'm saying this. I don't want to muse too much about what is lost vs. what is gained with the internet, I'm a couple years too late and think it's mostly amazing, I just hope it doesn't mean an end to writing as a craft done by hand with pen & paper.
My blog is a journal, but all I've been using it for is to post about school and to post design updates I'm working on. And to lament the fact that that's what I now use my blog for.
Instead of posting what I've done, I'd like to journal for just a bit on what I'm looking forward to: Going on a Valentine's getaway with my Valentine, going to see "Noises Off" with her in Provo, (she's never seen it. :)) in March. Seeing the Hush Sound come to Utah, (they're one of my favorite contemporary bands who had broken up a couple years ago, then got back together likely because they realized they made a lot more money that way, I mean because of the FANS! ;)) But the thing I'm looking forward to most is GRADUATING in APRIL and LOOKING for a new JOB, likely ONE as a GRAPHIC DESIGNER!!!! I'll likely let you know how that goes. I've been interviewing for additional internship opportunities, one has met with me and called me back, the others haven't responded at all except one I applied for about 3 months ago randomly contacted me. Anyhoo, that's all I got for now, Peace, but not literally.
Jan 25, 2013
About three years ago I wrote a Life Checklist. After some time to reflect, and instead of a top 100, I'm gonna go for a top 10. The impetus was because I had seen this fax that Michael Crichton sent to Chip Kidd about the Jurassic Park cover done by Kidd, and I thought "I want something like that." And because I decided that I really want to read a certain book before I die, and from what I've heard, it's kind of long.
I'm going to refrain from writing things like "be a good father & husband" or "be a good/happy person," because, while those of extreme importance to me, there's no real event or time you can check off "good father" in the checklist, it's a continual process, and this is just about things I want to do that I can check off. I'm also not going to include other things that are extremely important to me (see my work published, perform for a full house, become a father) but have already happened.
Some are recycled, most are new, in no particular order:
1. Receive a fax like this re: a book cover I designed, from a best-selling author. I'd be ok with an email.
2. Read all of Remembrance of Things Past by Marcel Proust.
3. Kiss the Blarney Stone.
4. Have a secret passageway in or around my home.
5. Hold all my grandchildren at once.
6. Create a masterpiece.
7. Meet Neil Gaiman.
8. Keep a secret.
9. Make peace with God.
10. Save a life.